Brown Phantom

Est. 2008 · Bangalore, India

"Notes from a man who read too much."

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  • 01

    How To Live

    How To Live Lately I've been wondering a lot about, well, how to live. In the quest to understand life, I‘ve read a lot: philosophy, evolutionary-biology, ne...

  • 02

    Tooth-Fairies And Soap

    Tooth-Fairies And Soap Yesterday I helped the cause of a budding barber. Although my right ear still hurts, I am satisfied with my readiness for an impromptu...

  • 03

    My New Place

    My New Place I am moving into a new house this decade end. It’s a little duplex, an independent two-bedroom house, not far from where I stay currently. At 90...

  • 04

    Trip Home

    Trip Home Lull is a funny word. And that’s what this place has been going through for a long while now. I have forgotten how to structure a post to the level...

  • 05

    My Jazz Album

    My Jazz Album In a bid to up the cool-quotient I’ve taken to jazz these days. Have come to realize that jazz is an interest that will need a bit more cultiva...

  • 06

    Things a man endures every morning

    Things a man endures every morning [Original Post](https://brownphantom.blogspot.com/2010/08/things-man-endures-every-morning.html)...

  • 07

    The Restaurant

    The Restaurant I picked up the menu card. The first page said ‘For Gents’. A bit odd, but you never know with these upscale restaurants. “Can I have My Yout...

  • 08

    The Usual

    The Usual So this guy walks into this pub. With swagger and all. Looks around. Three chicks drinking. None good enough for him. Goes straight to the bar....

  • 09

    Unborn

    Unborn Before she died, she had one last look at the sky. She has been sleeping since then, only to keep waking in another dream. Now she found herself on a...

  • 10

    All Apologies

    All Apologies I did this guest post here at Preeti's blog last week. And then Atrisa has tagged me with honest scrap here. Thank you Atrisa :P. The post fi...

  • 11

    Hello World

    Hello World This poor thing has been starving for months. And so, here’s an update on what I was up to during this time. Not that I expect/wish/accept that a...

  • 12

    Facebook Agony Aunt

    Facebook Agony Aunt Pokers Q. I am being poked and tickled a lot. Yesterday, a classmate I haven’t met for seven years pinched me. How do I react? A. It woul...

  • 13

    The Trip to Chilka Lake

    The Trip to Chilka Lake Couple of weeks ago I went to my friend Chitto’s wedding in Bhubaneswar. Yes, another man down. Back in Kharagpur, his room number wa...

  • 14

    Facebook Status Messages If Your Boss Is In Your Friend List

    Facebook Status Messages If Your Boss Is In Your Friend List You can’t escape having colleagues and bosses in your Facebook friend-list. Why not make the mos...

  • 15

    A Tree, A Lizard, And A Dementia

    A Tree, A Lizard, And A Dementia This is not a “proper” post, in a sense that it is being done just for the sake of discipline. Am working on something inter...

  • 16

    The Oversight

    The Oversight “The Consultant”, read the board. An arrow mark on the board pointed to the first floor. One might mistake it to be an arrogant declaration of...

  • 17

    Riders On The Storm

    Riders On The Storm I had a shocker today morning while driving. As soon as the radio was turned on, these were the words that fell on my ears: Into this ho...

  • 18

    Four Whatevers And A Song

    Four Whatevers And A Song Saying Hi To The Dead Get yourself a plain sheet of paper and a pen. Find an ant if the dead was a nice fellow. Else get a tiny sp...

  • 19

    Six Whatevers

    Six Whatevers Tete-a-tete “Nice wig.” “Takes one to know one.” “Mine is special. All hair in it belongs to my clients.” “Same here” “I know all the barbers h...

  • 20

    Mother

    Mother Mother, do you think they'll like this song? Mother, do you think they'll try to break my balls? Mother, should I build the wall? [Original Post](htt...

  • 21

    Five Whatevers

    Five Whatevers 1. Object Thou shalt not steal. Else, you are a thief. And the object, Stolen. 2. Work Rose, “I shall have the glory”. Thorn, “I too, will...

  • 22

    Three silly, but very short stories

    Three silly, but very short stories 1. Droplet "I would prefer a blackhole to a sponge", said the suicidal droplet. A river devoured it. 2. Shoes Twins. Bot...

  • 23

    Eight Seconds

    Eight Seconds “Not much of a hobby mate.” Johnny whispered loudly through the bushes. “Ummm?” said Pete distantly. His eyes fixed on the sky, as always. Alw...

  • 24

    So kid, what do you want to be when you grow up ?

    So kid, what do you want to be when you grow up ? [Original Post](https://brownphantom.blogspot.com/2009/12/so-kid-what-do-you-want-to-be-when-you.html)...

  • 25

    Her Diary

    Her Diary Everyday life for a female is never easy in a conservative society. Being a werewolf doesn’t help. Waking up naked beneath the park benches, even...

  • 26

    Tina

    Tina Damn the vulnerabilities of daily existence. Just when I was going to coin the term Pseudo-Swines for those who were cashing in on the flu-mania to stay...

  • 27

    Men In The Mirror

    Men In The Mirror Everyday as I drive to office, I dread that one minute, the time to be spent in the lift. The lift in my office has reflecting surfaces on...

  • 28

    Brought To You Bai

    Brought To You Bai My maid is on leave this week. Her absence is becoming noticeable day by day. Apart from executing her designated duties, she also acts a...

  • 29

    Ghanshyams vs Fairbrothers, and Bala goes to Singapore

    Ghanshyams vs Fairbrothers, and Bala goes to Singapore The Ghanshyams are at it again.Dark fat bastards. The barbarians hit each other harder and harder. Eac...

  • 30

    The Alchemistress

    The Alchemistress Stella was on the hospital bed. Her left leg plastered. This had to be the worst day she has had in years. She slipped over the stairs as s...

  • 31

    Rage Against The Tags

    Rage Against The Tags I have been busy doing nothing for the entire week. As a result, the blog suffered blatant neglect. Time to make amends. First, a few i...

  • 32

    Truth in Wine

    Truth in Wine A life’s work continues to conjure questions well past the funeral. Take Arthur’s case. His son was convinced that trash-can is the rightful pl...

  • 33

    Behavioural Inefficiencies

    Behavioural Inefficiencies 1. Here’s a puzzle with straightforward answer but many come up with incorrect solutions in real life: Imagine yourself seating on...

  • 34

    Short Story Contest and An Indecent Ending

    Short Story Contest and An Indecent Ending Here’s an entirely useless piece of information for more than 6 billion humans and the entire Ostrich species. I a...

  • 35

    The Twisted Telephonic Tales

    The Twisted Telephonic Tales Rain Gods, all over the world, have developed quirky little sadistic tendencies in response to the Global warming. But those in...

  • 36

    The Profound Lie

    The Profound Lie A solitary word spoken for the entire day and that too was a lie. Optimizations, in daily life, have been stretched too far I guess. Probabl...

  • 37

    VAT 69

    VAT 69 Centuries ago, strange events occured in abundance simply because there was no one to report them. They laid the foundations for many anomalies we obs...

  • 38

    Careful With That Axe, Eugene

    Careful With That Axe, Eugene Carla, the cat, was having a bad tail day and to top that, no one had noticed how well her new green nail polish went with her...

  • 39

    So Far Away

    So Far Away Beautiful Joanna lays naked on the beach, sipping her Pina-colada from the crystal glass. Sky is blue and the water green. Waves come and go, and...

  • 40

    We The People

    We The People Scenario 1 : Two kids with their Mom Mom : Sonu, Monu ! Come let's go to the Tagore Academy. There's an exhibition on Chola dynasty sculptures....

  • 41

    A Word Game

    A Word Game I’ve got almost three hours left, as these very words are typed, before I default on the grand promise made to myself of writing at least one pos...

  • 42

    Handshakes, Dating And Succumbing

    Handshakes, Dating And Succumbing Observing last few posts, I felt that the blog is getting too analytical and didactic. So the second part of the previous p...

  • 43

    How not to get duped at the petrol pump

    How not to get duped at the petrol pump It’s that time of the month again when Vinnie needs her food. I usually get the tank full at the petrol pumps for thr...

  • 44

    Radiosyncrasies

    Radiosyncrasies One of the many reasons why car-pooling won’t quite work for me is that I am too whimsical with the radio while driving. I don’t have TV as p...

  • 45

    I Think Therefore I am

    I Think Therefore I am Don't know why, but I find myself in an academic mood today. Please pardon me for these feeble attempts at explaining things that are...

  • 46

    In Praise Of Routine And In Glory Of Life

    In Praise Of Routine And In Glory Of Life The skin is getting its colour back. The blood is pure red now; gallons of alcohol have drained off. Sometimes thou...

  • 47

    A few Snaps of the trip in Goa

    A few Snaps of the trip in Goa Here are a few snaps. I am waiting for more from friends who may be kind enough to mail them at prashantdhanke@gmail.com if at...

  • 48

    Goa Trip : Introduction

    Goa Trip : Introduction So how was the trip ? Words one expects to hear are : "Awesome", "Fantastic"," Disaster" ... I am going to use similar words in a ch...

  • 49

    God's Own Child

    God's Own Child There were impatient knocks on my door this morning. I stopped Eminem swearing loudly on my Laptop, opened the door and found the delivery bo...

  • 50

    "Ascension" Short Fiction Contest

    "Ascension" Short Fiction Contest There's this cool short fiction contest going on here. You'll find some fantastic works there. None of the stories are more...

  • 51

    Dilli Ka Thug : Part 2

    Dilli Ka Thug : Part 2 Here goes the analysis of the first incidence in the Tricks-of-Trades series. I turned. It was him. Statistics: When I look back, I...

  • 52

    Dilli Ka Thug : Part 1

    Dilli Ka Thug : Part 1 This is the first anecdote in the series “Tricks of trades” introduced in an earlier post. Part 1 describes the incident while Part 2...

  • 53

    The Happening

    The Happening Wednesday evening. Around 9 PM. I called up Chitto to discuss about the Goa-trip that we three (third one being Pravu) had planned for the firs...

  • 54

    Tricks of trades: Introduction

    Tricks of trades: Introduction Friday night. Music was exploding inside Vinnie as she zipped through the traffic at dangerous speeds to bring me back to home...

  • 55

    What Happens In Dewas Stays In Dewas

    What Happens In Dewas Stays In Dewas After six long years, I celebrated Diwali with family in my home town Dewas (fondly called Las Dewas by expatriates). “...

  • 56

    Don’t cry over spilt milk

    Don’t cry over spilt milk Four babies are being born every second. Scientists at ISRO are toiling hard for nation’s first mission to moon this month. Rules a...

  • 57

    Shadows of the mind

    Shadows of the mind Since last quarter of an hour I’ve been wondering about the value of right hand. When no amount of money succeeded in luring me into part...

  • 58

    Infinity and beyond

    Infinity and beyond Another rain-filled lazy afternoon on the bean-bag in good old Bangalore. A little while later I am gonna have some coffee at the nearby...

  • 59

    Pride and Prejudice

    Pride and Prejudice I just booked the air-tickets to my place for Diwali. A dozen kilo has been deducted from my credit card. I’ve traveled the same distance...

  • 60

    My Sweet Family

    My Sweet Family Refrigerator: Hi, my name is Calvin. This chap bought me three years ago. I have seen few things in life: Apples, milk, coke, beer and whisky...

  • 61

    How we learnt "English" over the last few decades.

    How we learnt 'English" over the last few decades. Year 1958 . Well, first the basics . Movie : Dilli ka Thug C.A.T. Cat, Cat Maane Billi, R.A.T. Rat, Rat...

  • 62

    Vagina Monologue

    Vagina Monologue Younger Bro bought an expensive mobile against my pragmatic advice. As is often the case, big brother was right. The mobile would sometime a...